These last few months of being a stay-at-home mom have allowed me plenty of time to learn things about myself that I never really saw before...things that can only be discovered when no one else is looking. I'd like to say that I discovered I am a true go-getting, self-starting person who accomplishes every task I set out to do. Sadly, that is not the case. I did learn, however, that I possess a trait I am very determined to defeat. Sheer laziness.
Before I resigned from my job, I remember discussing with several of my co-workers how excited I was that I was going to take time off from work to be with Danielle. I was super-determined to use the extra time I had off to work out, exercise, and be a million times more active than I was able to sitting at my work desk all day. I thought for sure this was the solution to my ever-growing weight issue. I had envisioned for years how svelte and sexy I would be if I didn't have to work. I would be an exercising fool! I would work-out as my full-time job. Look out, Jillian Michaels - Amanda Meeks is on the rise! Alas, I may have lost a few pounds by eating healthier. But, I am as sedate as ever. This is where the self-discovery comes in:
My husband's Fruit-of-the-Looms should get credit for this revelation, actually. Earlier this week, he confronted me on the fact he had no clean underwear.
"Are you sure?" I asked.
"Uh, yeah." He replied.
"But there is several pairs in your drawer." I said in self defense.
"Have you looked at them? They are full of holes! I can't wear those!" he replied, exasperated.
"Then why do you still have them?" I asked, again in self-defense.
His look answered me that I was missing the point. Sternly, but lovingly, he said,
"Babe, you stay at home all day. The housework IS your job. You are falling behind and I need clean clothes for work!"
"Sweetheart, I am so sorry. I have just been really busy and didn't get to the laundry. I'll do it tomorrow," I promised him.
I knew I had been busy...but what did I do all day that I was so time consumingly exhausting? Let's see. I started out by waking up at 8 a.m. to Danielle yelling for me to come get her. Then I fed her a bottle. After that I put her in her play area and hopped on the computer. Then we had lunch...wait, lunch? How much time did I spend on the computer? After thinking about it, I realized I had wasted almost an entire day on that silly machine. The next thing I knew, David was coming home from work and I was still on the computer. Nothing like an eye-opening slap in the face to get your attention.
At first, I started to think of all the reasons why I felt like I had to "mentally check out" so often. I began to look for people and circumstances I could blame. But, God being the good Father He is, wouldn't let me get away with that. The next morning, I had a long talk with myself. I said, "Self - you are lazy. You spend way too much time being busy at things that have no importance, and have no energy left for the things you need to do. Just because you don't get a paycheck doesn't mean you don't have a job!" God was nodding in agreement with me, as He led me to an article by Lance Quinn at Grace to You Ministries on laziness. I have posted it at the bottom of my entry for you to read.
I have been thoroughly convicted. Rather than filling my day with meaningful tasks with a few idle moments in between, I had begun to justify the long stretches of laziness with the mindset, "I've worked hard at being the breadwinner for 16 years. This is my time to relax". This isn't going to fly. It is affecting my health, my marriage and, if I don't turn this mindset around, it will affect Danielle. She is a little sponge learning by imitating. I DO NOT want her to imitate me being lazy. Bad Mommy.
Now that I am armed with this information about myself, what am I going to do with it? First, I am going to be spending less time "eating the bread of idleness" and more time doing constructive, intentional tasks that will improve my and my family's state of well-being. Whether it is housework that I have been neglecting, a brisk walk with Danielle around the lake or cooking extra meals and keeping the fridge well stocked, it will get done and with an attitude of gratefulness. I need to enjoy the fact that I am able to stay home and do these things. Many women in this country would kill for the chance to stay home with their little ones...and I am fortunate to have such an opportunity. I must not squander it.
It is time for me to leave you with the thoughts below, and take care of some important matters around the home.
In fact, I think I'll start by tossing my husband's holey underwear.
Before I resigned from my job, I remember discussing with several of my co-workers how excited I was that I was going to take time off from work to be with Danielle. I was super-determined to use the extra time I had off to work out, exercise, and be a million times more active than I was able to sitting at my work desk all day. I thought for sure this was the solution to my ever-growing weight issue. I had envisioned for years how svelte and sexy I would be if I didn't have to work. I would be an exercising fool! I would work-out as my full-time job. Look out, Jillian Michaels - Amanda Meeks is on the rise! Alas, I may have lost a few pounds by eating healthier. But, I am as sedate as ever. This is where the self-discovery comes in:
My husband's Fruit-of-the-Looms should get credit for this revelation, actually. Earlier this week, he confronted me on the fact he had no clean underwear.
"Are you sure?" I asked.
"Uh, yeah." He replied.
"But there is several pairs in your drawer." I said in self defense.
"Have you looked at them? They are full of holes! I can't wear those!" he replied, exasperated.
"Then why do you still have them?" I asked, again in self-defense.
His look answered me that I was missing the point. Sternly, but lovingly, he said,
"Babe, you stay at home all day. The housework IS your job. You are falling behind and I need clean clothes for work!"
"Sweetheart, I am so sorry. I have just been really busy and didn't get to the laundry. I'll do it tomorrow," I promised him.
I knew I had been busy...but what did I do all day that I was so time consumingly exhausting? Let's see. I started out by waking up at 8 a.m. to Danielle yelling for me to come get her. Then I fed her a bottle. After that I put her in her play area and hopped on the computer. Then we had lunch...wait, lunch? How much time did I spend on the computer? After thinking about it, I realized I had wasted almost an entire day on that silly machine. The next thing I knew, David was coming home from work and I was still on the computer. Nothing like an eye-opening slap in the face to get your attention.
At first, I started to think of all the reasons why I felt like I had to "mentally check out" so often. I began to look for people and circumstances I could blame. But, God being the good Father He is, wouldn't let me get away with that. The next morning, I had a long talk with myself. I said, "Self - you are lazy. You spend way too much time being busy at things that have no importance, and have no energy left for the things you need to do. Just because you don't get a paycheck doesn't mean you don't have a job!" God was nodding in agreement with me, as He led me to an article by Lance Quinn at Grace to You Ministries on laziness. I have posted it at the bottom of my entry for you to read.
I have been thoroughly convicted. Rather than filling my day with meaningful tasks with a few idle moments in between, I had begun to justify the long stretches of laziness with the mindset, "I've worked hard at being the breadwinner for 16 years. This is my time to relax". This isn't going to fly. It is affecting my health, my marriage and, if I don't turn this mindset around, it will affect Danielle. She is a little sponge learning by imitating. I DO NOT want her to imitate me being lazy. Bad Mommy.
Now that I am armed with this information about myself, what am I going to do with it? First, I am going to be spending less time "eating the bread of idleness" and more time doing constructive, intentional tasks that will improve my and my family's state of well-being. Whether it is housework that I have been neglecting, a brisk walk with Danielle around the lake or cooking extra meals and keeping the fridge well stocked, it will get done and with an attitude of gratefulness. I need to enjoy the fact that I am able to stay home and do these things. Many women in this country would kill for the chance to stay home with their little ones...and I am fortunate to have such an opportunity. I must not squander it.
It is time for me to leave you with the thoughts below, and take care of some important matters around the home.
In fact, I think I'll start by tossing my husband's holey underwear.
WORK HARD AND DON'T BE LAZY!
Here are twenty practical principles from Proverbs to motivate you to work hard and avoid laziness. After you read through these principles, take the time to go back through and look up the origin of each principle in the book of Proverbs.
1. Remember, working hard is first a mindset (and so is laziness). [Proverbs 10:5; 15:19; 22:13; 26:13, 16]
2. Working hard and staying on task is a matter of self-control. [Proverbs 16:32b; 25:28]
3. Get up early. Try to stand up right when the alarm clock goes off. [Proverbs 20:13; 24:30-34; 26:14; 31:15]
4. Do hard jobs first and easier jobs second; then you can have fun. [Proverbs 22:29; 21:20; 24:27]
5. Love what you do as a vocation, regardless of what it is. Ask God to grant His blessing and favor in your work (cf. the account of Joseph in Genesis 39). [Proverbs 12:11, 14b; 28:19]
6. Don’t try to make money by deceit or fraud. If you do, God will punish you, sooner or later. [Proverbs 3:9-10; 10:2; 11:18; 15:27; 16:8; 20:14; 28:8, 20]
7. Be honest with your employer about how much you work. If you’re lazily collecting a paycheck, that’s stealing. [Proverbs 14:23; 20:17; 22:16; 30:8-9]
8. Don’t work so much, however, that you need to re-introduce yourself to your family. Strive for a healthy balance between your work and your family life. [Proverbs 13:11, 25; 15:16-17; 23:4-5; 24:3-4]
9. If you travel too much (according to your wife’s/family’s honest, loving assessment), seek to curb your travel, if possible. Perhaps another position would provide greater harmony in your home. [Proverbs 11:29; 15:22, 32; 18:15, 22; 19:20; 21:16]
10. If your wife is regularly wondering how the bills are going to be paid, and you’re not taking initiative to lead, confess your failure in leadership and take control of your family finances. [Proverbs 16:26; 19:14; 21:5; 26:15]
11. Treat your work (house cleaning, school work, or whatever it is) as though you will reap a harvest from your labors. [Proverbs 20:4; 27:18, 23-27]
12. Don’t work only in order to receive. Rather, find satisfaction in simply doing good work for God and men. [Proverbs 3:27-28; 12:26; 21:25-26; 24:21-22; 25:21-22]
13. Lazy people often assume that others owe them a handout (whether they’ve worked hard or not). Don’t fall into an entitlement mentality. [Proverbs 13:4]
14. When you are asked to serve in some way, don’t attempt to take the path of least resistance (because of laziness). [Proverbs 10:26; 19:15]
15. Consider how much more would be accomplished for the kingdom of Christ if you worked as hard in ministry as you do for a paycheck. [Proverbs 18:9]
16. Consider how your employer would evaluate you if his assessment was based on your work ethic in ministry. (Would you be fired?) [Proverbs 21:2]
17. If you are a lazy person, or if you tend toward laziness in certain areas of your life, confess your sin to God. Whether at home, at work, or in ministry, admit to God that you haven’t been working as hard as you should (He knows already), and ask Him to cleanse you from sin. [Proverbs 28:13]
18. Abandoning laziness and growing in diligence means you must be controlled by the Holy Spirit. Here are some practical steps you can take: [Proverbs 12:24, 27; 31:27]
a. Ask the Spirit to make you a hard worker for God.
b. Read, re-read, and even memorize the proverbs that pertain to both laziness and work.
c. Trust God to overcome any bad habits you’ve developed regarding work and diligence.
d. When you are tempted to be lazy, seek the Spirit’s help in prayer and remind yourself what the
Word of God teaches.
19. Show how the Proverbs on diligence and laziness are important by reading them to your family and then applying the biblical principles. Discuss with your family how you can hold one another accountable to be diligent workers for God and men. [Proverbs 1:8; 2:1-2; 3:1-2; 4:1-2, 10-11, 20; 5:1-2; 6:20; 7:1-3; 8:32-36; 22:17-21; 23:15-25]
20. Ask God to give you opportunities to become a hard worker, and then look for Him to answer in every realm of your life (home, work, school, ministry, etc.). [Proverbs 6:6-11; 24:30-34]
Lance Quinn - GTY Ministries
http://www.gty.org/Resources/Articles/A372