Nay Nay's Story:My gut reaction after reading Sissy's story was utter heartbreak. I literally broke down. The reality of how vulnerable I am about to become with my weight loss struggles is almost to much to bear. It means I have to get really honest with myself and truly discover why it is that I'm overweight. It isn't that I am ignorant about nutrition. Anyone who truly knows me, knows I am well-versed in that subject.
Eating has become a way to not feel my emotions or deal with issues that I grew up with. I have been putting myself on auto pilot. I have had my years with partying and drugs, but Michael-my love- gave me an ultimatum to get sober or he was leaving. I guess I still needed a way to "legally" numb my feelings of failure, disappointment, and worry. I was disappointed with my past actions and my grades in college, so, I can't help but feel I failed my parents expectations. I worry about finances, my family's health, my household and my daughter.
Enough is enough.
My happy weight is 130-135. When I delivered Lily, my now-15-month-old daughter, I weighed 211 lbs. Then something new got thrown in my mix. Depression. I felt so down that on top of caring for this new beautiful baby girl, I also had to care for myself enough to eat right and exercise, take care of Michael, keep the house clean, pay my bills on time, keep food in the house, etc... Its a hard adjustment for anyone.
Since having Lily, I have yo-yo'd between 173 and 180. I can't seem to pull myself out of this slump. My sister and I wanted to go public for many reasons. To inspire others and show they are not alone, to motivate, but I am also doing this to help to keep myself accountable.
Eating has become a way to not feel my emotions or deal with issues that I grew up with. I have been putting myself on auto pilot. I have had my years with partying and drugs, but Michael-my love- gave me an ultimatum to get sober or he was leaving. I guess I still needed a way to "legally" numb my feelings of failure, disappointment, and worry. I was disappointed with my past actions and my grades in college, so, I can't help but feel I failed my parents expectations. I worry about finances, my family's health, my household and my daughter.
Enough is enough.
My happy weight is 130-135. When I delivered Lily, my now-15-month-old daughter, I weighed 211 lbs. Then something new got thrown in my mix. Depression. I felt so down that on top of caring for this new beautiful baby girl, I also had to care for myself enough to eat right and exercise, take care of Michael, keep the house clean, pay my bills on time, keep food in the house, etc... Its a hard adjustment for anyone.
Since having Lily, I have yo-yo'd between 173 and 180. I can't seem to pull myself out of this slump. My sister and I wanted to go public for many reasons. To inspire others and show they are not alone, to motivate, but I am also doing this to help to keep myself accountable.
So I am stepping out of my comfort zone (that's an understatment) and am going to stop being so concerned about what other people think of me. I only need to answer to myself and to God.
I am a wife and mother and I am so blessed to have friends and family that love and support us. This is a new chaper in our lives and I'm glad we get to share this journey with you. Watch out because we're not giving up this time...
Rock on
*Nay-nay*
1 comment:
You go girls! Check out http://health.discovery.com/national-body-challenge/national-body-challenge.html and there's also this clinic in Crystal River that offers a medical weight loss program: http://citrusgynecology.com/weightloss.html There really isn't any magic bullet (diet/food/program/book, etc) other than getting moving and eating right. Eliminating most wheat from my diet, eating smaller portions, trying not to eat after 6pm, and making sure I move for at least 30 minutes a day has been the best system I've found yet for maintaining a healthy weight. I'll be rooting for you both. I love you dearly, girls! :-) Aunt T
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